Merry Christmas!
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Christmas morning
Here's the money shot... both girls opening the hot gift from Santa - iPod touch!
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
Friday, December 24, 2010
Why packing at 4am is NOT a good idea
So it's Christmas Eve, and we've safely arrived at our destination, had a good night's sleep, and now it's time to get ready for the day. I check my suitcase, and find that, to my horror...
I have no pants.
I packed shirts, underwear, socks, shoes, xc ski gear, and the outfit for the family portrait. But no pants. All I have are the jeans I wore on the drive, and the dress slacks for the party this afternoon. I now need to go shopping on Christmas Eve. Those who know how much I hate to clothes shop on ANY given day of the year can imagine my horror and dismay.
Sarah overheard my plight, and said "Mom, you need to ask Santa to bring you pants (tonight)!"
Oh, if only. So, I'm off to shower, put on yesterday's jeans, and head out in search of yoga pants. And toothpaste. And deodorant, because I forgot them, too. I suspect that this will be the 2010 Christmas party running joke, once my Dad hears about it. It's just too rich to pass up.
I have no pants.
I packed shirts, underwear, socks, shoes, xc ski gear, and the outfit for the family portrait. But no pants. All I have are the jeans I wore on the drive, and the dress slacks for the party this afternoon. I now need to go shopping on Christmas Eve. Those who know how much I hate to clothes shop on ANY given day of the year can imagine my horror and dismay.
Sarah overheard my plight, and said "Mom, you need to ask Santa to bring you pants (tonight)!"
Oh, if only. So, I'm off to shower, put on yesterday's jeans, and head out in search of yoga pants. And toothpaste. And deodorant, because I forgot them, too. I suspect that this will be the 2010 Christmas party running joke, once my Dad hears about it. It's just too rich to pass up.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Christmas Letter 2010
Merry Christmas from the Poulsens!
We’ve had a good year in 2010 – here’s an update on what we’ve been doing.
Trips: 4-day kayak/bike adventure (Laura only), Utah for the 4th of July, Wisconsin Dells with Kotziers & Grimes in August, Utah for the fall deer hunt (Gary only), Michigan for Christmas
Gary still works for 3M, and spends quite a bit of time on the road travelling to Ohio and New York state. He’s on a first name basis with most of the hotel staff in those cities, and loves the perks he gets as a frequent flier. He really got into shape this summer – he lost 25 pounds by logging 768 miles on various fitness activities – mostly cycling during the summer. He and Laura completed the 30 mile St. Paul Classic bike tour in September.
Laura is staying busy as president of the young women’s organization at church. When she’s not driving kids around, or teaching church lessons, she’s either on her new Macbook (love!!), writing the occasional blog post, riding her bike, cross country skiing, or… big accomplishment for the year… learning how to swim. (Yes, in her 40’s she finally took swim lessons – it wasn’t pretty!) There are no Olympics in her future, but at least now she’ll be safe when she starts kayaking next summer. She’s logged 860 fitness miles, not including the endless laps in the pool, and still doesn’t look like someone who exercises.
Sarah is in 7th grade and settling into middle school. She’s enrolled primarily in special-ed classes, but is mainstreamed for choir, which she loves. She’s a good “mommy” to her two goldfish, Goldie and Nemo, and continues to collect Care Bear, panda, and Rudolph items – even though there’s not much extra space left in her room! She’s pretty open to trying new things (for someone with autism) and so she spent a great week this past summer in a day camp for kids with autism. She wasn’t as crazy about the sports camp that Mom enrolled her in, but she was a trooper and found out that T-ball is kinda fun.
Madi is in 3rd grade, and excels at reading. Math is a little harder, but she doesn’t mind practicing using math games on Mom’s iPhone. She loves her rabbit, Marbles (aka “Bun Bun”), but still pines for a dog. She’s fierce at Pokemon on her Nintendo DSi, and is excited about learning to cross country ski on her brand new skis. She loves to collect just about anything, which tends to drive her mom crazy. She just had her first sleepover, and is really starting to dive into the “tween” lifestyle. She scares her mother with her computer proficiency; she’s gotten way too good at Googling, and would be addicted to YouTube if Mom didn’t get in the way. Her hero is Speed Racer (from the 1960’s animated series) and whenever she’s in the car, she insists on listening to the Elvis XM radio station.
As 2010 draws to a close, we are grateful for family, friends, and our many blessings. Have a wonderful and blessed Christmas and a joyous new year!
We’ve had a good year in 2010 – here’s an update on what we’ve been doing.
Trips: 4-day kayak/bike adventure (Laura only), Utah for the 4th of July, Wisconsin Dells with Kotziers & Grimes in August, Utah for the fall deer hunt (Gary only), Michigan for Christmas
Gary still works for 3M, and spends quite a bit of time on the road travelling to Ohio and New York state. He’s on a first name basis with most of the hotel staff in those cities, and loves the perks he gets as a frequent flier. He really got into shape this summer – he lost 25 pounds by logging 768 miles on various fitness activities – mostly cycling during the summer. He and Laura completed the 30 mile St. Paul Classic bike tour in September.
Laura is staying busy as president of the young women’s organization at church. When she’s not driving kids around, or teaching church lessons, she’s either on her new Macbook (love!!), writing the occasional blog post, riding her bike, cross country skiing, or… big accomplishment for the year… learning how to swim. (Yes, in her 40’s she finally took swim lessons – it wasn’t pretty!) There are no Olympics in her future, but at least now she’ll be safe when she starts kayaking next summer. She’s logged 860 fitness miles, not including the endless laps in the pool, and still doesn’t look like someone who exercises.
Sarah is in 7th grade and settling into middle school. She’s enrolled primarily in special-ed classes, but is mainstreamed for choir, which she loves. She’s a good “mommy” to her two goldfish, Goldie and Nemo, and continues to collect Care Bear, panda, and Rudolph items – even though there’s not much extra space left in her room! She’s pretty open to trying new things (for someone with autism) and so she spent a great week this past summer in a day camp for kids with autism. She wasn’t as crazy about the sports camp that Mom enrolled her in, but she was a trooper and found out that T-ball is kinda fun.
Madi is in 3rd grade, and excels at reading. Math is a little harder, but she doesn’t mind practicing using math games on Mom’s iPhone. She loves her rabbit, Marbles (aka “Bun Bun”), but still pines for a dog. She’s fierce at Pokemon on her Nintendo DSi, and is excited about learning to cross country ski on her brand new skis. She loves to collect just about anything, which tends to drive her mom crazy. She just had her first sleepover, and is really starting to dive into the “tween” lifestyle. She scares her mother with her computer proficiency; she’s gotten way too good at Googling, and would be addicted to YouTube if Mom didn’t get in the way. Her hero is Speed Racer (from the 1960’s animated series) and whenever she’s in the car, she insists on listening to the Elvis XM radio station.
As 2010 draws to a close, we are grateful for family, friends, and our many blessings. Have a wonderful and blessed Christmas and a joyous new year!
Thursday, December 16, 2010
This year's Christmas song
Last year I was enamored with Barenaked Ladies' version of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen". This year I have a new fave: O Holy Night by Weezer
Some may remember that O Holy Night is far and away my all-time favorite Christmas song. (I want it played at my funeral.) This is just a cool take on the song, and, as with all versions of the song... if I really listen and think about the words, I cry.
Some may remember that O Holy Night is far and away my all-time favorite Christmas song. (I want it played at my funeral.) This is just a cool take on the song, and, as with all versions of the song... if I really listen and think about the words, I cry.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Messing with time... and catching up!
For those who don't dig through my past archives to see if anything new is there (ie - everybody, 'cause who would DO that??), I've listed some new posts that I've buried in the archive, because I have this thing about everything being in order. Anyway, I've backdated the following posts so that they appear chronologically, based on when I first started the post, or when the event happened.
What, me, a hoarder?
Crying over pudding
Apple picking
Trick or Treating
Released... and normal??
This still doesn't catch me up, and the one post that I can't get to work is the one that most readers will really want to see - Madilyn's video comments on the first day of school. For some reason, the video won't upload and process correctly, even though I've been trying all day.
Arrrgh. Technology - wonderful and maddening all in one swoop.
What, me, a hoarder?
Crying over pudding
Apple picking
Trick or Treating
Released... and normal??
This still doesn't catch me up, and the one post that I can't get to work is the one that most readers will really want to see - Madilyn's video comments on the first day of school. For some reason, the video won't upload and process correctly, even though I've been trying all day.
Arrrgh. Technology - wonderful and maddening all in one swoop.
59 is back!
Sarah is very particular about her bus number. In the morning, she rides bus 59. Lately, that bus has been having mechanical trouble, so they've been using other buses on her route. Yesterday, it was 47.
Because of the layout of our street, you can hear the buses before you can see them. This morning, we heard the familiar bus roar, and Sarah exclaimed "59 is back!". Glancing down the street, I could make out the bus, but not the number. Puzzled, I turned to Sarah and asked "Can you tell it's 59 from how it sounds?"
"Yes," she replied, with a tone that suggested it was a stupid question.
As bus 59 reached the end of our driveway, I just shook my head and wondered yet again what it must be like to live inside her head.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Released... and normal??
I'm not sure if I've blogged about it, but I've been back in physical therapy for the last two months. I had stopped doing my daily PT exercises, and I guess over the course of the summer, had lapsed back into bad (muscular) habits. Once school started again, and Madi and I were walking every day, my backside started hurting again. Apparently bike riding doesn't strain my muscles, but walking does, which is why I didn't have any problems during the summer.
Not wanting things to get as bad as they did last year, I immediately called my physical therapist and started working with her again. Things progressed much more quickly this time, and today I was discharged, pain-free, with a declaration of "normal". Ah, right. That means that, right now, my butt muscles are the only part of my life that I would qualify as "normal". Gotta start somewhere, right?? :)
The rest of me might take a bit longer to achieve that designation...
Impromptu campfire
As we all happened to be outside near sunset on Sunday, I suggested that we have an impromptu campfire; perhaps our last of the season. Everyone (except Sarah) agreed that it was a great idea. So, instead of a healthy meal, we had s'mores for dinner. Hey, I never said I was a good parent.
This is what it truly looked like. We had lots of fun just sitting and staring at the fire. Marshmallows, chocolate, and graham crackers helped, too. Sarah eventually came outside to claim her marshmallows, but campfires aren't really her thing. After all, this is the kid that won't let me light candles in the house, unless they're on a cake.
This is the scene, "exposed" by the camera flash. It really was dark outside. BTW - that's ROOT beer in Gary's hand, lest anyone think he's gone astray... :)
Monday, November 1, 2010
Trick or Treating
Although I showed the girls in their costumes in my Oct 27th post, I wanted to post some pics from Halloween night. Sarah decided that she didn't want to go out trick or treating, and I wasn't going to push the issue - the girl does NOT need candy in her life! So, Madi and Dad headed out.
This year, we tried a new tactic to guarantee proper trick-or-treating manners... at every house where Madi forgot to say "thank you", Dad got to keep the candy from that house. Much to Dad's dismay, she didn't forget once! This is definitely a rule for future Halloweens.
Without Sarah to restrict their radius, they came back with quite a haul. Madi's pumpkin was filled to the brim, and Dad's pockets were bulging with his own stash, given directly to him by sympathetic parents.
Sarah was a little jealous, and suddenly decided that she wanted to go trick-or-treating. When told that she would have to put on her costume and walk around, she decided that it wasn't worth the effort. Madi gave her a few pieces of candy, and all was good. There certainly wasn't a shortage of candy in the house, as Mom WAY overbought for the 12 trick-or-treaters that showed up at our door.
This year, we tried a new tactic to guarantee proper trick-or-treating manners... at every house where Madi forgot to say "thank you", Dad got to keep the candy from that house. Much to Dad's dismay, she didn't forget once! This is definitely a rule for future Halloweens.
Without Sarah to restrict their radius, they came back with quite a haul. Madi's pumpkin was filled to the brim, and Dad's pockets were bulging with his own stash, given directly to him by sympathetic parents.
Sarah was a little jealous, and suddenly decided that she wanted to go trick-or-treating. When told that she would have to put on her costume and walk around, she decided that it wasn't worth the effort. Madi gave her a few pieces of candy, and all was good. There certainly wasn't a shortage of candy in the house, as Mom WAY overbought for the 12 trick-or-treaters that showed up at our door.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Happy Halloween!
It was a bumper year for pumpkins at our house...
The girls painted the faces a few weeks before carving. It was killing them to have just plain pumpkins hanging around...
Fall Cleanup
Yesterday was a wonderful fall day - crisp, with lots of sun. We spent time getting the yard ready for winter. Below are some pics from our day - Madilyn wasn't a fan of raking, but the promise of some playtime in the leaves was enough incentive to get her moving.
Yes, Sarah really is using the leaf vac. She stayed at it for quite a while, and seemed to be having fun. She sure was proud of herself when she was done!
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Farewell to soccer
Today was the last day of Madi's soccer for the season, and perhaps for her career. After dabbling with the sport at age 5 (or so, I can't remember), she took a few years off, and didn't seem to miss it. Last year, though, her friend Ava asked her to be on her team. Unfortunately, it just didn't work with our schedule, so we had to pass. This year, however, we made room in the schedule so that Madi could play.
Turns out, though, that she doesn't really like it much. I give her credit for sticking with it through the whole season, and not complaining about going to practice or the games. She was a trooper, but we both agree that she's probably done with the sport for now.
Here are some pictures from this season. Her team was very recreational and laid back (perfectly suited for Madi) and ended up with a 1-3 record for the season, ranked 6th of 7 teams. There aren't many action shots because (1) Madi didn't have a lot of field time and (2) I'm not good at taking action shots!
Turns out, though, that she doesn't really like it much. I give her credit for sticking with it through the whole season, and not complaining about going to practice or the games. She was a trooper, but we both agree that she's probably done with the sport for now.
Here are some pictures from this season. Her team was very recreational and laid back (perfectly suited for Madi) and ended up with a 1-3 record for the season, ranked 6th of 7 teams. There aren't many action shots because (1) Madi didn't have a lot of field time and (2) I'm not good at taking action shots!
Great action shot... too bad there's not a ball in sight!
At least she had fun!
Overheard at a soccer game
Sarah knows that people on the sidelines shout during a game, but she doesn't quite get it. Here's a sample of her exclamations:
Fire!
My iPod is stolen!
You need to do the front showcase!
Ms LaCasse!
Emergency!
You can do it! (wow, that one was unknowingly appropriate...)
Various groaning and screaming sounds, along with insane laughter (lots of this)
We definitely get some strange looks from other parents...
Fire!
My iPod is stolen!
You need to do the front showcase!
Ms LaCasse!
Emergency!
You can do it! (wow, that one was unknowingly appropriate...)
Various groaning and screaming sounds, along with insane laughter (lots of this)
We definitely get some strange looks from other parents...
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Porcupine...gone!
My husband shaved off his (super extra prickly) deer hunting beard today! Hooray!! Now I might actually kiss the guy...
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Trunk or Treat
Every year our church hosts a "trunk or treat" party. This year, because our ward is so small, we combined with two other wards, creating a Utah-normal sized ward. This was quite a shock for our girls, who are used to much smaller events. It was fun, but too much of the evening was spent waiting in line, either for the games, or at the end during the candy parade.
Because the weather outside was cold and rainy, they did their trick or treating inside. They lined up any adults who had candy in chairs along the hall, had all the kids line up, and then had them parade down the line, getting candy from each person. It went incredibly slowly, and really wasn't much fun. But, a bucket full of candy at the end cures a lot of ills, and everyone went home happy.
Sarah announced that this year she wanted to be candy corn, because "it's my favorite Halloween candy!" Though the power of the internet, Mom was able to make it happen.
Madilyn wanted to be Princess Peach, from Super Mario Bros. That girl loves her video games. Both Mom and Dad were slightly unsettled to see her looking so beautiful in makeup...
Madilyn brought her friend Andrew, who sported a coordinating costume... Luigi from Super Mario Bros.
Because the weather outside was cold and rainy, they did their trick or treating inside. They lined up any adults who had candy in chairs along the hall, had all the kids line up, and then had them parade down the line, getting candy from each person. It went incredibly slowly, and really wasn't much fun. But, a bucket full of candy at the end cures a lot of ills, and everyone went home happy.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Riding the Pumpkin Train
Yes, there really is a train called the "Pumpkin Train", and we did indeed take the trip. The ride starts in Osceola, WI and travels through some pretty country to Dresser, WI, where the depot has a pumpkin patch as well as games for the kids, etc. My friend Ann talked me into it, on a day when the kids were off school for conferences.
Everyone had a really great time!
Everyone had a really great time!
The whole crew, waiting to board the train
All of us, squished onto one seat on the way to the pumpkin patch. The conductor came by and punched our tickets, just like an old-time train ride.
Sarah wasn't too keen on going inside the "haunted" depot. Madi, on the other hand, thought it was a blast, and ran through several times (it wasn't very big).
Madi's height gave her a decided advantage in the hay maze...
Madi and I had lots of fun pumping the hand cart up the tracks. Got a nice history lesson from our guide, too!
One of Sarah's favorite activities was the coloring station. She didn't really want anything to do with face painting...
Included in the price of the ticket was a free pumpkin. I invoked the "you need to be able to pick it up and carry it yourself" rule, but still ended up lugging two pumpkins back onto the train. At least it was the final thing we did before leaving for the ride home.
Ann and I on the return ride, with our matching face-painted spiders. It was all fun, but the police officer and the other drivers looked at me pretty strangely when I was involved in a fender-bender on the way home! (Max was not seriously injured, but the Bonneville that caused the accident was totalled - but that's another story!)
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Picking the Perfect Pumpkin
I spent most of September denying Sarah the opportunity to buy a Halloween pumpkin... our rule has become "no pumpkins until October". So, of course, the first Saturday in October has become our pumpkin hunting day. We always head to Axdahl's in Stillwater, because they do such a great job arranging the pumpkins, and it's always a great photo op. See the results below!
Ready to start our hunt for the perfect pumpkin.
Madi was pretty impressed by the huge stack of pumpkins, and had to clown around a bit before getting serious about her quest for "the one".
Madi declared these "freaky".
It was a wonderful day for taking pictures.
If, at the time, I had been thinking about blogging this adventure, I would have taken a picture of the girls with the pumpkins that they chose for a closing photo. Sorry - didn't happen. I can tell you that they both chose smaller pumpkins than last year, which made Dad very happy at the cash register! (Last year we let them pick whatever size they wanted, as long as they could pick it up. They didn't have to carry it - just lift it. This year we were smarter and had them carry their own... worked much better, and was much cheaper.)
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Always better with a friend
So as I posted before, I've signed up for the 2011 Pedal & Paddle adventure (kayaking and biking) and am really looking forward to it. Well, now I'm even MORE excited, because my friend Clarinda is going to be joining me!! Outdoor adventures are always more fun with friends... and if we made it through Girls Camp together, pampered camping should be a snap!
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Apple picking
End of September always means apple picking at our house. We head off to Stillwater, and Aamodt's orchards. Our favorite to pick are the Haralson apples, as they make the best apple butter.
This year, because of the unusually warm spring, the entire growing season was shifted, and most of the Haralsons were picked by the time we got there. This wasn't really a problem - we filled our little bag, and then bought the rest of what we needed in the barn. The ones in the barn were much bigger, and easier to process for the apple butter. Of course, we couldn't leave without a pie, some donuts, and apple cider, too...
Posing at the tree.
Having a tall (and strong!) Dad comes in handy...
My kids just can't smile naturally when there's a camera pointed at them.
Cider and apple donuts - YUM!
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Training
Better just keep cranking it out... I took the plunge and signed up for next June's peddle & paddle - and chose the 72 mile ride option. I better start putting some serious mileage on this fall!
This was one of those rides when you really want to quit right after you get started... it was in the low 50's with a drizzle. The sun wasn't really up yet, and the first 10 miles were just slogging it out. I was glad that I stuck with it - it warmed up somewhat (and I raised my core temp), and the sun kept peeking out, and the rain disappeared. Proof yet again that sometimes you have to endure the crud to experience the good.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Disconnecting
So, I'm going to be trying an experiment - I'm going to try partially disconnecting from the internet. I say partially, because I'm still going to check email, and I'm still going to blog, but I'm going to severely limit my surfing and facebook time.
I think I'm far too addicted, and need to step back. We'll see how this goes...
I think I'm far too addicted, and need to step back. We'll see how this goes...
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Crying over pudding
Yes, you read the title correctly - I actually starting crying over pudding. Specifically, over the flavor. An explanation is necessary, I agree.
Madilyn is home from school sick today, and has been hanging out in bed. I asked her if she wanted a pudding cup, and she enthusiastically agreed. I went to find a chocolate pudding - her favorite. When I checked the pantry, we were all out of chocolate, and only had vanilla. I brought her one, and asked her if that was OK. She said "Sure, Mom. I like vanilla," and took it without a second thought.
I actually teared up at this point. She looked at me like I was nuts (and rightly so). "Mom, are you crying?" she asked.
I explained that I was just so grateful that I didn't have to go through the 15 minutes of yelling, blaming, and calming down that I would have had to handle if it had been her sister not getting her desired flavor of pudding.
When I shared this experience with my therapist, she commented how similar my responses are to those of an abused spouse - always anticipating a blowup, waiting for the next trigger, etc. Wow. That really caught my attention, because there's some truth in that. I don't like to admit it, but the kid does make me cower sometimes, and really does drive our interactions.
Now the challenge is to take that knowledge, and use it to improve things. I may not be able to change Sarah, but I sure can change how I react to her. Again I say it - parenting is tough.
Madilyn is home from school sick today, and has been hanging out in bed. I asked her if she wanted a pudding cup, and she enthusiastically agreed. I went to find a chocolate pudding - her favorite. When I checked the pantry, we were all out of chocolate, and only had vanilla. I brought her one, and asked her if that was OK. She said "Sure, Mom. I like vanilla," and took it without a second thought.
I actually teared up at this point. She looked at me like I was nuts (and rightly so). "Mom, are you crying?" she asked.
I explained that I was just so grateful that I didn't have to go through the 15 minutes of yelling, blaming, and calming down that I would have had to handle if it had been her sister not getting her desired flavor of pudding.
When I shared this experience with my therapist, she commented how similar my responses are to those of an abused spouse - always anticipating a blowup, waiting for the next trigger, etc. Wow. That really caught my attention, because there's some truth in that. I don't like to admit it, but the kid does make me cower sometimes, and really does drive our interactions.
Now the challenge is to take that knowledge, and use it to improve things. I may not be able to change Sarah, but I sure can change how I react to her. Again I say it - parenting is tough.
The Perils of Initiative
So, every parent wants their child to be aware of the needs of others, and to take the initiative when they can, right?
Yesterday afternoon, I wasn't feeling very well around the time that Madilyn's bus dropped her off after school. (Actually, that's a huge understatement, but elaborating would really be TMI for this blog). I usually like to meet her at the bus stop and walk the quarter mile home with her; it gives me a chance to chat with her about her day, uninterrupted by other issues. But Madilyn is plenty old enough to walk home by herself, and has done so on many occasions, so I stayed in bed.
That's where the initiative part comes in. Sarah decided, unbeknownst to me, that she would meet Madilyn at the bus stop and walk home with her. So she did. And I didn't know a thing about it, until Sarah came into my room and announced "I got her! Madilyn's home!" It's not unusual for Sarah to make pronouncements regarding the arrival or departure of others; in fact, it's almost expected. But when I looked at her and saw that her glasses were dark (transitions lenses), the "I got her!" part registered. Madilyn, close on her sister's heels, confirmed that Sarah did, indeed, walk all the way to her bus stop, and then back to the house with her.
Sarah was so happy with herself she was giggly. How could I ruin such a proud moment? She saw that I was sick, that something needed to be done, and she did it. I high-fived her, and thanked her for being such a good big sister. (I privately thanked Madilyn for walking her sister home, too).
So now what do I do? We live in a safe area, with good neighbors (who, if they had seen her, would have stopped her and brought her back home). But Sarah just doesn't have any awareness of danger. I'm certain she was walking down the middle of the street, and I shudder to think if she had tried to cross the "main" road - maybe she would have looked for cars, maybe not. But the scariest thing is that she probably would have gotten into a car with anyone who asked. So, where do I draw the line? Because now she's so pleased with herself that she wants to do it every day. On the positive side, that's a half mile of walking, a lot of independence and initiative, and (really) very little risk. But she's got the decision-making skills of a 3 year old, and I wouldn't let a toddler meet her sister at the bus alone.
I've said it before, and I'm saying it now - parenting is NOT for sissies. This #$&% is HARD... and it's not going to get any easier.
Yesterday afternoon, I wasn't feeling very well around the time that Madilyn's bus dropped her off after school. (Actually, that's a huge understatement, but elaborating would really be TMI for this blog). I usually like to meet her at the bus stop and walk the quarter mile home with her; it gives me a chance to chat with her about her day, uninterrupted by other issues. But Madilyn is plenty old enough to walk home by herself, and has done so on many occasions, so I stayed in bed.
That's where the initiative part comes in. Sarah decided, unbeknownst to me, that she would meet Madilyn at the bus stop and walk home with her. So she did. And I didn't know a thing about it, until Sarah came into my room and announced "I got her! Madilyn's home!" It's not unusual for Sarah to make pronouncements regarding the arrival or departure of others; in fact, it's almost expected. But when I looked at her and saw that her glasses were dark (transitions lenses), the "I got her!" part registered. Madilyn, close on her sister's heels, confirmed that Sarah did, indeed, walk all the way to her bus stop, and then back to the house with her.
Sarah was so happy with herself she was giggly. How could I ruin such a proud moment? She saw that I was sick, that something needed to be done, and she did it. I high-fived her, and thanked her for being such a good big sister. (I privately thanked Madilyn for walking her sister home, too).
So now what do I do? We live in a safe area, with good neighbors (who, if they had seen her, would have stopped her and brought her back home). But Sarah just doesn't have any awareness of danger. I'm certain she was walking down the middle of the street, and I shudder to think if she had tried to cross the "main" road - maybe she would have looked for cars, maybe not. But the scariest thing is that she probably would have gotten into a car with anyone who asked. So, where do I draw the line? Because now she's so pleased with herself that she wants to do it every day. On the positive side, that's a half mile of walking, a lot of independence and initiative, and (really) very little risk. But she's got the decision-making skills of a 3 year old, and I wouldn't let a toddler meet her sister at the bus alone.
I've said it before, and I'm saying it now - parenting is NOT for sissies. This #$&% is HARD... and it's not going to get any easier.
Desiring the unattainable
Isn't it just so true that the moment that you can't have something is the moment that it becomes infinitely desirable?
I was planning on a long bike ride this morning after getting the kids off to school. I woke up only moderately excited about it; after all, I was pretty sick last night, didn't know what route to take, wasn't sure where my cycling clothes were (or if they were even clean...), needed to do my physical therapy exercises first... yada, yada, yada. Life was definitely threatening to get in the way.
Then Madilyn got up and found out that she had the same stomach/digestive issues that had me in agony last night. Immediately, warring impulses sprang to life in my head - my virtuous side had serious empathy for the girl; she's got some serious misery to contend with for the next 12 hours. But then I heard from my wicked, whiny side, who noted that "today is a beautiful fall day and, oh yeah, it's supposed to rain the rest of the week", and "why, oh why, do my plans always get ruined?!" Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to be on my bike. Because I couldn't.
I guess the moral of the story here is to be honest with myself, and be more accountable for how I choose to use my time. Because the truth of the matter is that I have missed far more chances to ride because of my poor choices than I have because I need to take care of someone else. It's just way easier to blame external circumstances. I think (hope?) these realizations mean that I'm finally starting to understand how to "Seize the day!"
Now, if I could only figure out how to turn off the inner drama queen, so I can stop pouting!
I was planning on a long bike ride this morning after getting the kids off to school. I woke up only moderately excited about it; after all, I was pretty sick last night, didn't know what route to take, wasn't sure where my cycling clothes were (or if they were even clean...), needed to do my physical therapy exercises first... yada, yada, yada. Life was definitely threatening to get in the way.
Then Madilyn got up and found out that she had the same stomach/digestive issues that had me in agony last night. Immediately, warring impulses sprang to life in my head - my virtuous side had serious empathy for the girl; she's got some serious misery to contend with for the next 12 hours. But then I heard from my wicked, whiny side, who noted that "today is a beautiful fall day and, oh yeah, it's supposed to rain the rest of the week", and "why, oh why, do my plans always get ruined?!" Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to be on my bike. Because I couldn't.
I guess the moral of the story here is to be honest with myself, and be more accountable for how I choose to use my time. Because the truth of the matter is that I have missed far more chances to ride because of my poor choices than I have because I need to take care of someone else. It's just way easier to blame external circumstances. I think (hope?) these realizations mean that I'm finally starting to understand how to "Seize the day!"
Now, if I could only figure out how to turn off the inner drama queen, so I can stop pouting!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
All things Clarinda: Back To Blogging: Women Who Inspire
Wow. I'm the subject of a blog entry... and not one ranting about something that I did wrong!
I sent the post link to my husband, who read it, and simply smiled. He missed a big opportunity to gain major brownie points with a comment like "I don't need to read a blog post to know how fabulous you are!" (Yes, even after 15 years of marriage, I still haven't accepted that looking for compliments from him is like searching for icebergs in the Sahara... :) )
Anyway, I giggled like a schoolgirl when I read the post. It's a HUGE warm fuzzy when someone whom you admire pays you a compliment. Thanks for making my day, Clarinda, and for helping me realize how uplifting it can be to simply share what's in your heart and head. I love, appreciate, and admire so many people, and yet rarely ever say a word about it. Time to change that!
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Back to being twisted
As is true with so many things in life, I have reverted to my old twisted self since gradually abandoning the exercises that straightened me out. Things in life just take work, and apparently, my (physical) alignment is no exception!
As I blogged about earlier, I was in physical therapy to straighten myself out, and (literally) remove the pain in my butt. The exercises worked, and I was able to move without pain, and felt good. But of course, once you start feeling good, you wonder why you need to keep doing the exercises, and easily fall back into old habits.
Well, all it took was walking Madilyn to school once to bring the pain back... and send me straight back to the therapist. So, I'm back in physical therapy... hoping to learn once again that things just don't change overnight, and actually require work. Daily. For a long time.
As I blogged about earlier, I was in physical therapy to straighten myself out, and (literally) remove the pain in my butt. The exercises worked, and I was able to move without pain, and felt good. But of course, once you start feeling good, you wonder why you need to keep doing the exercises, and easily fall back into old habits.
Well, all it took was walking Madilyn to school once to bring the pain back... and send me straight back to the therapist. So, I'm back in physical therapy... hoping to learn once again that things just don't change overnight, and actually require work. Daily. For a long time.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Taking the plunge...
It's been a lifelong dream of mine to own a kayak. I remember going to demo days when I was in my 20's, seeking out the perfect boat.
Now, when I say I'm taking the plunge, I wish I could say that I'm actually going to buy a kayak, but that's not the case. Instead, I'm going to tackle one of the hurdles that prevents me from enjoying the sport.
I can't swim.
I can float (kinda), and splash around well enough, but if I actually needed to travel any distance on my own in water, well... it wouldn't happen. Especially if there were currents involved. Up to this point, I've compensated for this disability by always kayaking with someone, who (I assume) could help me if things went bad.
But now that I actually have the time and funds to do some kayaking, I don't have anyone who's available to go with me. Although solo kayaking isn't the safest, I am tired of waiting for all conditions to be perfect before getting involved. So... I'm signing up for private swimming lessons in the hopes that I will gain the confidence for some easy solo lake trips.
The last swim lessons I had (over 30 years ago) were not terribly successful; in fact, I seem to remember the instructor telling my mother something to the effect of "not everyone can get comfortable in the water and be a successful swimmer..." but I will not let this affect my determination to try. I am not coordinated, I am not athletic, but I am not going to be a quitter. The end result may not be pretty, but I will learn to swim. I just hope, for the sake of my wallet, that it only takes one 8 session block of lessons.
9/9 update: I did it! Starting on the 28th, I'll be taking lessons.
Now, when I say I'm taking the plunge, I wish I could say that I'm actually going to buy a kayak, but that's not the case. Instead, I'm going to tackle one of the hurdles that prevents me from enjoying the sport.
I can't swim.
I can float (kinda), and splash around well enough, but if I actually needed to travel any distance on my own in water, well... it wouldn't happen. Especially if there were currents involved. Up to this point, I've compensated for this disability by always kayaking with someone, who (I assume) could help me if things went bad.
But now that I actually have the time and funds to do some kayaking, I don't have anyone who's available to go with me. Although solo kayaking isn't the safest, I am tired of waiting for all conditions to be perfect before getting involved. So... I'm signing up for private swimming lessons in the hopes that I will gain the confidence for some easy solo lake trips.
The last swim lessons I had (over 30 years ago) were not terribly successful; in fact, I seem to remember the instructor telling my mother something to the effect of "not everyone can get comfortable in the water and be a successful swimmer..." but I will not let this affect my determination to try. I am not coordinated, I am not athletic, but I am not going to be a quitter. The end result may not be pretty, but I will learn to swim. I just hope, for the sake of my wallet, that it only takes one 8 session block of lessons.
9/9 update: I did it! Starting on the 28th, I'll be taking lessons.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
First day of school
Today is the first day of school, and everyone in the family is excited! (Sarah might not look it in the picture below, but the girl just doesn't photograph well.) Sarah is in 7th grade, Madilyn is in 3rd, and Mom is in heaven. *happy dance*
Adding to the wonder of the day, BOTH girl's busses were ON TIME today. Honestly, that has never, ever happened on the first day of school, and is a VERY.BIG.THING for someone with autism! Sarah actually left for her first day happy and flapping her hands instead of in tears. JOY!
Here are Madilyn's thoughts this morning:
Monday, September 6, 2010
It's been too long
I haven't posted anything worth reading in quite some time, and I regret that. But... tomorrow I get my life back - school starts!!
I am SO looking forward to being able to complete a thought without being interrupted. My mind is reeling with the possibilities!
I am SO looking forward to being able to complete a thought without being interrupted. My mind is reeling with the possibilities!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
toxicgirl's Activities | RunKeeper
You know, all I really want out of all this exercise is to actually look like I'm athletic. So far, no such luck.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
Saturday, July 31, 2010
What, me, a hoarder?
I am a hoarder.
When I announced this to my husband one night, his eyebrows immediately shot up, followed by a quick denial. After all, I am the one with this sign hanging in my kitchen:
It is true that I tend to drive him crazy by getting rid of things... but I'm not a hoarder of things, exactly... I'm a hoarder of information. I hate to have to say "I don't know." I simply can't get rid of data.
Do you know how many piles of paper that I have, saying that I need to "someday" digitize the information? I haven't needed any of the info in those piles in years, but I hold some great desire to somehow hold on to every piece of data regarding our family. Someone might need to know how many times Sarah went to speech therapy in 1999, right? Sigh.
My therapist is helping me get some perspective on all of this, and see how much of a burden I'm putting on myself by trying to keep track of everything. This is not an easy battle, but hopefully, one I can win.
toxicgirl's Activities | RunKeeper
Longest ride this year... feeling pretty confident about the St. Paul Classic in September, especially if I could ride my road bike. I will, however, ride my mountain bike. It's appropriate handicapping for riding with my husband, who doesn't own a road bike.
Next time I want to go farther, so I can say that I rode to Wisconsin. Wouldn't that sound cool??
Monday, July 26, 2010
Great essay on "stuff"
Read a great essay on "stuff" today, and wanted to share the link: Here's just a little snippet.
Amen!! Of course, when it comes to talking about "stuff", the classic George Carlin sketch is still my favorite.
A historical change has taken place, and I've now realized it. Stuff used to be valuable, and now it's not.
In industrialized countries the same thing happened with food in the middle of the twentieth century. As food got cheaper (or we got richer; they're indistinguishable), eating too much started to be a bigger danger than eating too little. We've now reached that point with stuff. For most people, rich or poor, stuff has become a burden.
Amen!! Of course, when it comes to talking about "stuff", the classic George Carlin sketch is still my favorite.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
I can't believe it finally happened...
I got my macbook!!
I am in shock. It feels good to be back in the mac world, after almost 20 years away. (OK, I can't believe that I'm old enough to have something in my life gone for 20 years...) Anyway, after being one of the first owners of the Apple IIe, using my Macintosh Plus in college, and starting my career at 3M lugging my "portable" MacPlus... I'm finally back with a sleek new 13" macbook. I chose the smaller version for weight and portability options - the 15" would have been nice, but I never would have taken it as many places.
Adding to the general computer euphoria around here - We purchased a new cable modem and router. Went for the big guns - Docsis 3 modem... on initial setup the Comcast speed test clocked it at 60 Mbps on a wired connection pinging a server here in the twin cities. Actual use on wireless connection is more like 20 Mbps, not bad considering we pay for the 16 Mbps service! The Comcast rep promised me that they wouldn't throttle me down, but that I might not always get that level of performance. I'll enjoy it while it lasts. Went for the N gigabit router with usb port, so we're good to go. I plan on connecting either an external HD or a printer, but that's a project for AFTER I get all my stuff transferred to my mac.
Oh, and that crushing depression that I mentioned in an earlier post? Gone. :)
I am in shock. It feels good to be back in the mac world, after almost 20 years away. (OK, I can't believe that I'm old enough to have something in my life gone for 20 years...) Anyway, after being one of the first owners of the Apple IIe, using my Macintosh Plus in college, and starting my career at 3M lugging my "portable" MacPlus... I'm finally back with a sleek new 13" macbook. I chose the smaller version for weight and portability options - the 15" would have been nice, but I never would have taken it as many places.
Adding to the general computer euphoria around here - We purchased a new cable modem and router. Went for the big guns - Docsis 3 modem... on initial setup the Comcast speed test clocked it at 60 Mbps on a wired connection pinging a server here in the twin cities. Actual use on wireless connection is more like 20 Mbps, not bad considering we pay for the 16 Mbps service! The Comcast rep promised me that they wouldn't throttle me down, but that I might not always get that level of performance. I'll enjoy it while it lasts. Went for the N gigabit router with usb port, so we're good to go. I plan on connecting either an external HD or a printer, but that's a project for AFTER I get all my stuff transferred to my mac.
Oh, and that crushing depression that I mentioned in an earlier post? Gone. :)
Thursday, July 15, 2010
July
It's July, and I am suffering from crushing depression. It happens
every year, and I am at a loss to explain it. Most people get January
or February blues, a post holiday letdown or fatigue from winter, but
not me. There must have been some dramatic event that occurred in
July that I'm repressing... why else would my world seem darkest in
the middle of the sunny summer when everyone else is busy living life?
Just one more thing that makes me a few bubbles off center. :)
every year, and I am at a loss to explain it. Most people get January
or February blues, a post holiday letdown or fatigue from winter, but
not me. There must have been some dramatic event that occurred in
July that I'm repressing... why else would my world seem darkest in
the middle of the sunny summer when everyone else is busy living life?
Just one more thing that makes me a few bubbles off center. :)
Friday, June 25, 2010
Summer!
I am still alive.
Really.
I have just sworn off the computer for all but essential stuff, and have actually been *gasp* outside.
Can't wait to leave for Utah, where I'll still have just as much stuff to manage, but more people to help. ;-)
Really.
I have just sworn off the computer for all but essential stuff, and have actually been *gasp* outside.
Can't wait to leave for Utah, where I'll still have just as much stuff to manage, but more people to help. ;-)
Monday, May 24, 2010
(lack of) speed
I just sat down at my computer to "shop" for some new shoes while I ate my lunch. I finished my lunch before the computer was even ready for me to type in a web address. I need a new computer.
OK, I know that what I need to do is go in and optimize things, but really - wouldn't a new computer be easier? And prettier? And faster? Oh yeah - it would require money. There goes that idea.
OK, I know that what I need to do is go in and optimize things, but really - wouldn't a new computer be easier? And prettier? And faster? Oh yeah - it would require money. There goes that idea.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
The trip that might be the end of me...
...or the start of something great!
At the end of last month, I signed up for a "all fitness levels welcome" women-only pedal/paddle excursion through the local parks & rec department. The trip's start point is north of Duluth, so I'm counting on fabulous scenery. The timing isn't great, but what can you do? It's the last 2 days of school, and I'm choosing to look at it as my last hurrah before the "buckle down and work" that is summer around here. (Side note: seriously, I don't understand these moms who "can't wait!" for summer - summer is ten times the work of any other season, and the hardest 3 months of my year. Basically, I'm working 18 hour days, and it's hot. ugh.)
Anyway, I figured that, even though I'm still 20+ pounds overweight, I should be able to handle a "all fitness levels" activity... until I spoke with the outfitter.
Here's the schedule of events:
Thursday - arrive at campsite by 6 for happy hour, dinner, socializing.
Friday - breakfast, kayak training, then 7 (!!) hours on the river. Some Class I rapids, that we can portage if desired. (Side note: I was freaked by this until Google revealed that Class I is just a notch above still water. Class IV is the biggie. whew.) Happy hour (naptime for me?), followed by dinner & social time.
Saturday - a choice of 40 or 75 mile bike ride to new campsite. More happy hour, dinner, and socializing.
Apparently, the happy hour thing is a big draw...? Anyway, I'm counting on the alcohol consumption of others to lower the overall performance bar. Am I so out of shape I can't keep up with a bunch of hung-over women? (hmmm)
Now, spending a few nights in a sleeping bag (even with an air mattress) is not going to make my back very happy, but I'm hoping that fistfuls of Advil will overcome that hurdle. What will be harder is (1) kayaking for that long, and (2) biking 40 miles with a body that just endured all that kayaking... and then slept on the ground all night!
So, you will notice the addition of RunKeeper data to my workout page as I begin conditioning myself for the bike portion of this adventure. The kayak training is going to be harder, but it looks like ab/core workouts will help. I've been watching kayak videos on the internet, and, although helpful, are not the same as doing.
So when my kids come downstairs to find me sitting on an exercise ball, practicing my stroke using a closet rod, they're going to think Mom has lost it. And maybe I have, but it's a ride that's exhilaratingly scary.
Whoo hoo! Here we go!
At the end of last month, I signed up for a "all fitness levels welcome" women-only pedal/paddle excursion through the local parks & rec department. The trip's start point is north of Duluth, so I'm counting on fabulous scenery. The timing isn't great, but what can you do? It's the last 2 days of school, and I'm choosing to look at it as my last hurrah before the "buckle down and work" that is summer around here. (Side note: seriously, I don't understand these moms who "can't wait!" for summer - summer is ten times the work of any other season, and the hardest 3 months of my year. Basically, I'm working 18 hour days, and it's hot. ugh.)
Anyway, I figured that, even though I'm still 20+ pounds overweight, I should be able to handle a "all fitness levels" activity... until I spoke with the outfitter.
Here's the schedule of events:
Thursday - arrive at campsite by 6 for happy hour, dinner, socializing.
Friday - breakfast, kayak training, then 7 (!!) hours on the river. Some Class I rapids, that we can portage if desired. (Side note: I was freaked by this until Google revealed that Class I is just a notch above still water. Class IV is the biggie. whew.) Happy hour (naptime for me?), followed by dinner & social time.
Saturday - a choice of 40 or 75 mile bike ride to new campsite. More happy hour, dinner, and socializing.
Apparently, the happy hour thing is a big draw...? Anyway, I'm counting on the alcohol consumption of others to lower the overall performance bar. Am I so out of shape I can't keep up with a bunch of hung-over women? (hmmm)
Now, spending a few nights in a sleeping bag (even with an air mattress) is not going to make my back very happy, but I'm hoping that fistfuls of Advil will overcome that hurdle. What will be harder is (1) kayaking for that long, and (2) biking 40 miles with a body that just endured all that kayaking... and then slept on the ground all night!
So, you will notice the addition of RunKeeper data to my workout page as I begin conditioning myself for the bike portion of this adventure. The kayak training is going to be harder, but it looks like ab/core workouts will help. I've been watching kayak videos on the internet, and, although helpful, are not the same as doing.
So when my kids come downstairs to find me sitting on an exercise ball, practicing my stroke using a closet rod, they're going to think Mom has lost it. And maybe I have, but it's a ride that's exhilaratingly scary.
Whoo hoo! Here we go!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Face Time
Tonight, as I was applying the fifth product in my nightly face routine, it really struck me how much time, money, and effort I've been putting in lately to try and hold back time. I never used to care much what I looked like. Seems like the mid 40's have changed my outlook, but when I took an honest look in the mirror, I realized that I really wasn't having that much success, anyway.
That got me thinking about returns on investment, and how I really should be focusing on increasing my INNER beauty.
Friday, May 7, 2010
Life's a Journey
I haven't blogged much, and I've felt guilty about it. I read this the other day, and it made me feel better:
Things are difficult now; the last thing I need to do is take pictures... unless they're cute ones of my kids. :-) Hopefully I can post some of those soon.
How many times have you heard someone who is in a challenging situation say, "I am going through a rough patch" or something similar? The key is in the phrase "I am going through."
If you are in a similar situation, my advice is to keep going through whatever you are dealing with. A friend, J.T. O'Hara, had a unique way of saying the same thing: "When you are going through hell, don't stop to take pictures." That's where the problem lies. In today's world of high tech, we have so many ways to "take pictures" and constantly share them with everyone we meet. We love to wallow in our troubles by sharing with others just how bad our life really is. I guess misery really does love company.
Just how bad is your life, really?
-Wally Amos, "Going Through", The Costco Connection, May 2010, pg 11.
Things are difficult now; the last thing I need to do is take pictures... unless they're cute ones of my kids. :-) Hopefully I can post some of those soon.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
The computer's fault
Whenever I am running late or feeling out of time, it can always, always, always be traced back to my computer in one way or another. I seriously have a love/hate relationship with my pc.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Sniffing out an answer
OK, strange title, I know, for a post about my sore throat - but it's related, I promise.
I've had a sore throat on one side only every day since around Feb 25th. After about 3 weeks of waiting for it to turn into something, I went to see the doctor, who told me that everything looked fine. They did a throat culture, and since the strep test was negative, she sent me to an ENT (ear, nose, throat doctor).
It took about a week to get into see the ENT, but the pain has been really minor - more of an annoyance in the morning and evening, really - so it wasn't that big a deal. I knew that during the appointment, they'd use some equipment to look down my throat, so I knew that I couldn't take the kids with me. Madilyn would probably think the scope was cool, but the whole experience would be too much for Sarah to bear.
Boy, was I glad they didn't come! Ugh! It was almost too much for ME to bear! I was picturing something down my throat, via the expected route... not via my NOSE. My eyes watered so prolifically the entire procedure I had rivers running down my cheeks. Luckily, it was pretty quick.
So... was he able to sniff out an answer? Nope. My throat looks fine. I was really hoping for a benign polyp or something they could just snip off, giving me a cause and solution, all in one. But, no, my throat looked just fine; no sign of anything. He walked through all the scenarios with me, but it basically boils down to - just wait 2 or 3 months, and come back if it's still hurting. He assured me that it wasn't anything serious. I'm fine with that - as I said, the pain is not that bad, but a little closure would have been nice.
I've had a sore throat on one side only every day since around Feb 25th. After about 3 weeks of waiting for it to turn into something, I went to see the doctor, who told me that everything looked fine. They did a throat culture, and since the strep test was negative, she sent me to an ENT (ear, nose, throat doctor).
It took about a week to get into see the ENT, but the pain has been really minor - more of an annoyance in the morning and evening, really - so it wasn't that big a deal. I knew that during the appointment, they'd use some equipment to look down my throat, so I knew that I couldn't take the kids with me. Madilyn would probably think the scope was cool, but the whole experience would be too much for Sarah to bear.
Boy, was I glad they didn't come! Ugh! It was almost too much for ME to bear! I was picturing something down my throat, via the expected route... not via my NOSE. My eyes watered so prolifically the entire procedure I had rivers running down my cheeks. Luckily, it was pretty quick.
So... was he able to sniff out an answer? Nope. My throat looks fine. I was really hoping for a benign polyp or something they could just snip off, giving me a cause and solution, all in one. But, no, my throat looked just fine; no sign of anything. He walked through all the scenarios with me, but it basically boils down to - just wait 2 or 3 months, and come back if it's still hurting. He assured me that it wasn't anything serious. I'm fine with that - as I said, the pain is not that bad, but a little closure would have been nice.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Not THAT bad...
Thanks to all who expressed their concern over my running lamentations. Fear not, I won't pursue something that doesn't bring me any joy... but I also won't give up without giving it a fair shake. Cross country skiing was frustrating at first - just ask my husband about our first skiing trip - but now you can't keep me off the trail when the snow flies.
Thanks, also, for all the tips and recommendations. I do have proper shoes, vetted by my physical therapist, and know the proper stretches to do to keep things loose... I just need to DO them.
My primary hope in my post was to document how I felt at the beginning, so that a few months down the road, when I'm feeling the running love, I can laugh and be proud that I persevered. I'm grateful to all those who were worried for me! *hugs*
Thanks, also, for all the tips and recommendations. I do have proper shoes, vetted by my physical therapist, and know the proper stretches to do to keep things loose... I just need to DO them.
My primary hope in my post was to document how I felt at the beginning, so that a few months down the road, when I'm feeling the running love, I can laugh and be proud that I persevered. I'm grateful to all those who were worried for me! *hugs*
Saturday, March 27, 2010
The transformative power of data
I went on my first outside (non-treadmill) run today. I think that first runs should always be done on a warm, sunny, spring day, when the pure joy of being outside after a long winter buoys you up and helps you ignore how terribly out of shape you are.
My guess would be that it would greatly improve your attitude. I say "guess", because my first run was at 6:30 am on a 42 degree dark and cloudy morning - so I wasn't feeling the love. At all. Actually, by about mile 1.75, I hated running with a passion. I thought of the surge of joy that I feel every time I start off on a bike ride; the "this is where I belong... I love this!" feeling I get every time I ride.
Running doesn't give me that. It humbles me and gives me pain.
I did try out a new iPhone app - RunKeeper - this morning, and it may help me actually make good on my commitment to run a 5K. I turned it on when I started my workout, and it used my phone's GPS to track my speed, location, and distance. At the end of your workout, you can view a map of your run (or other activity) as well as a chart of your speed and elevation changes.
Toxicgirl c25k w1w3 workout
Anyone who has known me more than, say, a day knows how I love me some data. It's like a drug, and it's truly scary how it can change my attitude in a split second. One minute I'm standing in my driveway, certain that I have just finished my first and last ever outside run... then I hit "stop workout" on my phone, and get the summary. Suddenly, I'm in love - more with the data than the running, but it benefits from the sudden rush. "Hey! I did better than I thought! Maybe this isn't so bad, after all. I'll have to see how the chart looks next time."
Next time?? What happened to first and last run ever? My outlook changed so fast I'm now nursing a severe case of mental whiplash.
Sigh. I guess I better go and research preventing shin splints, because it looks like the data high is going to keep me going... at least for a while.
My guess would be that it would greatly improve your attitude. I say "guess", because my first run was at 6:30 am on a 42 degree dark and cloudy morning - so I wasn't feeling the love. At all. Actually, by about mile 1.75, I hated running with a passion. I thought of the surge of joy that I feel every time I start off on a bike ride; the "this is where I belong... I love this!" feeling I get every time I ride.
Running doesn't give me that. It humbles me and gives me pain.
I did try out a new iPhone app - RunKeeper - this morning, and it may help me actually make good on my commitment to run a 5K. I turned it on when I started my workout, and it used my phone's GPS to track my speed, location, and distance. At the end of your workout, you can view a map of your run (or other activity) as well as a chart of your speed and elevation changes.
Toxicgirl c25k w1w3 workout
Anyone who has known me more than, say, a day knows how I love me some data. It's like a drug, and it's truly scary how it can change my attitude in a split second. One minute I'm standing in my driveway, certain that I have just finished my first and last ever outside run... then I hit "stop workout" on my phone, and get the summary. Suddenly, I'm in love - more with the data than the running, but it benefits from the sudden rush. "Hey! I did better than I thought! Maybe this isn't so bad, after all. I'll have to see how the chart looks next time."
Next time?? What happened to first and last run ever? My outlook changed so fast I'm now nursing a severe case of mental whiplash.
Sigh. I guess I better go and research preventing shin splints, because it looks like the data high is going to keep me going... at least for a while.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Reactions
Apparently, you can now have "reactions" to blog posts. I guess this is kinda like the "like" button on Facebook. Anyway, I've added it to my posts, so now you can "react" to them. Hope I can get this to work...
*posts entry*
*logs back into edit*
OK, I'm not seeing them, and unfortunately, don't have time to try and make it work. Maybe in the future...
*posts entry*
*logs back into edit*
OK, I'm not seeing them, and unfortunately, don't have time to try and make it work. Maybe in the future...
Where's the snow when I need it??
So now I am SO wishing for some snow again... so I can try out this new cool new app that I downloaded for my phone, called RunKeeper. It uses the phone's GPS to track you on your workout, so that you know distance, speed, elevation, route, etc. for workouts. It would have been perfect to use on my skiing this winter! I'll use it for my walking, running, and biking this summer instead. For my inside workouts, I'll rely on the Nike+ iPod sensor that my mother-in-law got me for my birthday (which, unfortunately, doesn't work with the skiing motion.)
All this accountability! Now I'll hopefully see some real progress over the summer if I can remember to move properly! Last year's injury really slowed me down, but this year I'm determined to run at least one 5K. There, I wrote it. I'm committed! Now I just need to use what my physical therapist taught me and really think when I'm running. If I don't focus on proper hip rotation, things get all sorts of messed up. Guess so many years of being twisted has really done a number on me... but I'd like to think it's never too late to change.
So - if you're a RunKeeper member, look for "toxicgirl" stats... that's me! I posted my first workout of the c25k (couch to 5K) series today.
All this accountability! Now I'll hopefully see some real progress over the summer if I can remember to move properly! Last year's injury really slowed me down, but this year I'm determined to run at least one 5K. There, I wrote it. I'm committed! Now I just need to use what my physical therapist taught me and really think when I'm running. If I don't focus on proper hip rotation, things get all sorts of messed up. Guess so many years of being twisted has really done a number on me... but I'd like to think it's never too late to change.
So - if you're a RunKeeper member, look for "toxicgirl" stats... that's me! I posted my first workout of the c25k (couch to 5K) series today.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
New Skis are Here!
My skis came in the mail yesterday afternoon, and I almost immediately put them in the car and headed to the ski shop to have the bindings installed. At the risk of sounding more girly than I actually am, I love how they match my new boots and are SOOOO pretty!!
I wanted to post about my first outing on new skis, but am so busy that I'm going to cheat and just copy my ski log entry below... hence the sentence fragments, etc. I use a different standard of writing on the ski log, but you'll get the idea...
3-2 (solo) Vadnais Lake. Maiden outing with my new skis!! While now I can actually glide, this was not the trail for it today - most of the trail is in the sun, and the snow was very soft and mushy. Temps were in the high 30's. Skied the 4.3K in about an hour, but was very tired at the end. Going up hills is so much easier now, but steering is much harder - I've got an extra 12 inches of ski to compensate for. Only fell once at the very end when I couldn't navigate the turn. So amazing to feel my skis respond differently to different pressure zones! Had fun leaning and shifting my weight all over to figure out what would happen.
I wanted to post about my first outing on new skis, but am so busy that I'm going to cheat and just copy my ski log entry below... hence the sentence fragments, etc. I use a different standard of writing on the ski log, but you'll get the idea...
3-2 (solo) Vadnais Lake. Maiden outing with my new skis!! While now I can actually glide, this was not the trail for it today - most of the trail is in the sun, and the snow was very soft and mushy. Temps were in the high 30's. Skied the 4.3K in about an hour, but was very tired at the end. Going up hills is so much easier now, but steering is much harder - I've got an extra 12 inches of ski to compensate for. Only fell once at the very end when I couldn't navigate the turn. So amazing to feel my skis respond differently to different pressure zones! Had fun leaning and shifting my weight all over to figure out what would happen.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
New Calling... yipes!
Well, it's official - Sunday I was sustained as the Young Women's president. Because she can't keep a secret AT ALL, I didn't tell Sarah (or Madilyn) beforehand. After it was announced in sacrament meeting, Sarah turned to me and said "What? I don't want you in Young Womens! I want Sister Vessels! Where is Sister Vessels going??".
I sure wish she'd learn to whisper these things...
Anyway, later I think she got comfortable with the idea, but this will be an interesting ride, to say the least...
I sure wish she'd learn to whisper these things...
Anyway, later I think she got comfortable with the idea, but this will be an interesting ride, to say the least...
Friday, February 12, 2010
Oh, and in other news...
I can't believe I forgot to mention... I ordered my new skis today!!! Gary says that this should buy him at least a full 6 weeks of (insane amounts of) travel with no complaints from me. If he wants to buy my silence, that's just fine with me. This time, silence comes in the form of Salomon's Elite 6 Vitane Grip W skis with SNS Pilot bindings. *sigh*
Hope my skis get here before the snow is gone! *happy dance*
It DOES make a difference
OK, so I've been trying really hard to just focus on becoming a better skier, getting in better shape, etc. I've really been resisting the "if I had better gear I would do better" route, because it's a dangerous (not to mention expensive) one. I was way too into that scene with cycling in my 20's, and in spite of all the cash I wasted, I was never really any good.
But OH how I love my new boots! I skied Sucker Lake with Kate today, and felt like someone had sprinkled magic fairy dust in my boots! It was a beautiful day, and it just felt like I had an extra kick in my glide. Maybe it was just that Kate was finally feeling better and able to join me. Skiing is so much better with a friend.
But OH how I love my new boots! I skied Sucker Lake with Kate today, and felt like someone had sprinkled magic fairy dust in my boots! It was a beautiful day, and it just felt like I had an extra kick in my glide. Maybe it was just that Kate was finally feeling better and able to join me. Skiing is so much better with a friend.
Grail... Found and Captured!
After dropping Madilyn off at school, I headed off to REI. Because of the timing, I knew I'd get there before they opened, so I spent some time at Trader Joe's. When I drove over to the REI parking lot at 9:58, it was FULL, with an incredible number of people heading toward the doors. Turns out their super clearance started this morning, and so the store was packed! I am so glad that I called yesterday and had them hold the boots.
Got the boots from the service desk, and tried them on. Heaven! No more cold toes for me, for sure. Best thing - they are backward compatible with my current ski bindings, so I can use them while waiting for my new skis.
Right about now, my husband is reading this (from some remote location), and a chill is passing over his wallet. Sorry, sweetie... was I supposed to check with you first? Guess this gives you permission to spend money, too...
So, anyway, now I have new boots...and I picked up a pair of smartwool socks, too. Oh, and a new ear wrap. Unfortunately, none of them were part of the "super clearance" (figures), but they were mostly on sale.
And it's sunny today! The trail awaits...
Got the boots from the service desk, and tried them on. Heaven! No more cold toes for me, for sure. Best thing - they are backward compatible with my current ski bindings, so I can use them while waiting for my new skis.
Right about now, my husband is reading this (from some remote location), and a chill is passing over his wallet. Sorry, sweetie... was I supposed to check with you first? Guess this gives you permission to spend money, too...
So, anyway, now I have new boots...and I picked up a pair of smartwool socks, too. Oh, and a new ear wrap. Unfortunately, none of them were part of the "super clearance" (figures), but they were mostly on sale.
And it's sunny today! The trail awaits...
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Hard Choices
So today was another fabulous ski day, but, much as it hurt, I didn't strap on the skis. Instead, I was caught up in a buying frenzy. I haven't spent any money (yet) but burned away a whole afternoon figuring out how I could...
I don't know much about this new sport I've adopted, but I've found a ski shop that does, and is willing to give advice. When I found out that I could get skis at half-off retail through my wonderful brother-in-law
Turns out, I've been under the mistaken impression that the ski was the most important component of the whole skiing experience. The boots are the most important, followed by the bindings! I guess a good boot is the difference between your skis spending time on the trail or gathering dust in the closet. He recommended finding a boot I like first, rather than the other way around.
Finding a boot in February during a good, snowy Minnesota winter is, well, tough. Almost impossible. I came close enough at Joe's (Sporting Goods) to know I'm on the right track, and I'm heading off to REI tomorrow to try on what may be the last pair of size 7.5 Salomon ski boots left in the Twin Cities.
The Holy Grail of my quest... the Siam 7 Pilot CF. (picture via www.gearwest.com)
Wish me luck! I'm just hoping that I can make it back in time to hit the trails before school gets out.
I don't know much about this new sport I've adopted, but I've found a ski shop that does, and is willing to give advice. When I found out that I could get skis at half-off retail through my wonderful brother-in-law
insert shameless plug: When in Utah, rent your alpine gear at Ski 'N See! Awesome people, awesome stores! www.skinsee.comI went to FinnSisu to get sizing and fit advice. After confirming that I should be skiing a 198cm ski (my current skis are 167 cm... can you say SHORT?) and that the skis I was considering were appropriate, I asked about boots and bindings.
Turns out, I've been under the mistaken impression that the ski was the most important component of the whole skiing experience. The boots are the most important, followed by the bindings! I guess a good boot is the difference between your skis spending time on the trail or gathering dust in the closet. He recommended finding a boot I like first, rather than the other way around.
Finding a boot in February during a good, snowy Minnesota winter is, well, tough. Almost impossible. I came close enough at Joe's (Sporting Goods) to know I'm on the right track, and I'm heading off to REI tomorrow to try on what may be the last pair of size 7.5 Salomon ski boots left in the Twin Cities.
The Holy Grail of my quest... the Siam 7 Pilot CF. (picture via www.gearwest.com)
Wish me luck! I'm just hoping that I can make it back in time to hit the trails before school gets out.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Sucker Lake
For the record... the title of this post is not intended to be witty... that's really the name of the lake.
Today was even more beautiful than yesterday, and Kate was just as sick, so I found myself on my own once again for skiing. I decided to investigate the other half of the park that I skiied yesterday, and ski the Sucker Lake loop. I was a little nervous about going it alone, as a portion of this trail was marked "more difficult" - not standard trail nomenclature, to be sure. More difficult than what, exactly? Luckily, the "guide" that I met on Tuesday scoffed at the notion that this side of the park was difficult, and he was right. There were a few hills, only one that was a little challenging, and only one downhill worth noting. The trail was beautiful, though. The groomer had been through, and only one person had skiied it yet - my "guide" from the day before. I ran into him in the parking lot as he was leaving and I was starting out.
The weather was in the 20s, sunny, and fabulous. The pictures don't do it justice. I loved the Vadnais part of this park, but now I don't know which I prefer! This trail was equally beautiful. When skiing past some open water, I saw a flock of 8+ white swans floating peacefully. I can't believe that I have driven past this park every week for the past 2 years and not realized it! What a gem.
And yes, I did email a photo to Gary from the trail, with the subject "vicariously" and a message reading "where are you right now?". It goes without saying that he did not in any way respond to either of my taunting emails. Aargh. Where's the fun in that??
Today was even more beautiful than yesterday, and Kate was just as sick, so I found myself on my own once again for skiing. I decided to investigate the other half of the park that I skiied yesterday, and ski the Sucker Lake loop. I was a little nervous about going it alone, as a portion of this trail was marked "more difficult" - not standard trail nomenclature, to be sure. More difficult than what, exactly? Luckily, the "guide" that I met on Tuesday scoffed at the notion that this side of the park was difficult, and he was right. There were a few hills, only one that was a little challenging, and only one downhill worth noting. The trail was beautiful, though. The groomer had been through, and only one person had skiied it yet - my "guide" from the day before. I ran into him in the parking lot as he was leaving and I was starting out.
The weather was in the 20s, sunny, and fabulous. The pictures don't do it justice. I loved the Vadnais part of this park, but now I don't know which I prefer! This trail was equally beautiful. When skiing past some open water, I saw a flock of 8+ white swans floating peacefully. I can't believe that I have driven past this park every week for the past 2 years and not realized it! What a gem.
And yes, I did email a photo to Gary from the trail, with the subject "vicariously" and a message reading "where are you right now?". It goes without saying that he did not in any way respond to either of my taunting emails. Aargh. Where's the fun in that??
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Vadnais Lake
Sunday and Monday brought a lot of snow to our area; so much so that I wasn't even interested in going skiing on Monday... too much loose powder, and no chance of a set-in track yet; it was coming down too heavily. Tuesday, however, was a different story. I let all the die-hard skiiers go out in the drifts and heavy snowfall (which, for the record, Kate thought were PERFECT skiing conditions... proving that contrary to our normal contention, we are not always on the same page...) Monday night and set in a trail. I headed out to Vadnais Lake on Tuesday, and got in a great ski. I had to go it alone, since Kate was near death with a sinus infection, but I kept her in my thoughts ;-)
The weather was great - light snowfall, overcast skies, temps in the high teens. The trail was 4.7K, with one steep hill at the beginning that was easily conquered with the "running" technique Kate taught me our last time out. The rest of the trail was easy, gradual slopes, with some fantastic scenery. I especially liked the section with the Nordic pines - so beautiful, reminiscent of northern California. I skiied part of the trail with a local retiree who could quote the last 30 years of park history and learned a lot! We saw 3+ deer on 3 separate occasions. My self-appointed guide claimed that there was an eagle in residence, although I wouldn't know... when I'm skiing, looking anywhere but straight in front of me is a guaranteed faceplant. Watching the skies is completely out of the question... I even have trouble looking around when I'm standing still, but that's another story. Here are some pics from this adventure.
I have to note that I emailed one of these to my husband (who was travelling and stuck in an airport) with the subject "This is where I am right now"... followed by the words "Nyah nyah". I convinced him to buy me an iPhone, and now I use it to taunt him. Yeah, I'm that mean.
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